How to prioritise

I've worked with life coaches on and off for 20 years now (I feel old typing that!). The first coach that I had was when I was 20 following the death of my mum. I was halfway through my university degree (pharmacy); alongside the grief, I was struggling with my new role as housekeeper.

On reflection now, I'm grateful that I stayed at home in Aberdeen when I went to university, as it meant that I was there when my mum's health deteriorated. However, it also meant that I had a house to help manage on top of my studies. My dad had a busy job, and it was my sister & I that then had the responsibility of the cooking, cleaning etc.

One of the first things that my coach worked with me on was prioritisation.

When you have a number of plates that you are spinning, or a huge list to-do list - how do you prioritise?

This morning I started thinking about all the different areas of my life that I'm managing, and it is very easy to slip into negative thoughts and get overwhelmed. Perhaps you can relate?

You might be juggling a day job with a small business on the side; parenting, or like me solo parenting; caring for elderly or unwell relatives; be struggling yourself with poor health (physical or mental); managing a house renovation - this list could be endless.

I've got a few businesses that I'm running - pharmaceutical consulting, life coaching and my art - and for each of these there are tasks to be done… meetings with clients, social media management, marketing & PR (writing this newsletter for instance), course launches, continuing professional development, meetings with my own coach. As a single parent, there are the daily activities that come alongside this too - school pick-ups and drop offs; taking my children to and from their extra-curricular activities and the invisible emotional load that I'm currently navigating (we're still in the midst of a very tricky situation). There's the never ending laundry basket, the food shopping, cleaning the house, walks with Evie… and loads more I'm sure!

The good news is, the important stuff all gets done - I have plenty evidence that I can accomplish lots and I turn to this when my inner critic kicks in. (I've got an e-book that I've written on Affirmations that might be helpful if you want to explore your inner dialogue in more detail - download it here).

If you've been a regular follower, you will know that I harp on a lot about personal values. This was one of the most impactful exercises that I did with my coach. Once you are clear on your personal values, it's a lot easier to make decisions and prioritise your list. I've also recorded a YouTube video on this topic, which is available here.

Take some time to write out your to-do-list - consider this your Master list, and get everything written down. This will be where you add tasks so that you don't forget them… and from this Master list you can then schedule tasks in your calendar and also create a daily/weekly to-do-list. If you'd like my ‘to-do-list’ template, grab it here.

Then using the personal values that you've determined… have a think about the following questions -

What are your current goals? Make sure that you have activities on your list that will facilitate your goals being completed.

Are there any items on your list that can be removed? Go ahead and score these off.

Are there items on your list that are ‘nice to have’ rather than ‘essential’? Put a down arrow next to the ‘nice to have’ items, to indicate that these are lower priority (there's a column for priority in my to-do-list template)

Are there any items that would take less than 1-2 minutes to complete? Just go ahead and get them done. It will feel so good to get something scored off your list, and will give you momentum to keep going.

Are there any items that you can do simultaneously? Perhaps there is a podcast that you would like to listen to, and you could do this whilst you clean your house. Are there any calls that you need to make, and can you schedule these for whilst you are driving?

Can you delegate any of your tasks? For example, now that my son is in high school he walks to and from school on his own, which frees up some of my time for other things (normally laundry!). Is there an option to carpool with any other local parents for pick-up/drop-off at clubs? Go ahead and make any necessary arrangements.

Is it feasible to outsource some of your list? For example, if the ironing does not bring you joy, can you afford to send out the ironing to a local laundrette? I have a dog walker that I use a couple of days a week, which massively frees up my time and, for me, is worth the investment. I've also been getting a few evening meals & portions of soup each week from a local chef, who cooks the food in his own home and then delivers it to me…again, well worth it in my eyes. For the small business owners, maybe this looks like hiring a virtual assistant to provide support for the regular administrative tasks that feature on your list.

Once you have your final list, it's good to get everything scheduled. I use an electronic calendar, and I use time blocking and colour coding. What gets scheduled gets done! At a glance you will be able to see where you have gaps in your schedule to play with, and importantly, this will allow you to schedule in fun activities that bring you joy (hopefully they already feature in your calendar, but if not get them added!).

Another good question to think about is this - is your diary supporting your dream?

Next, using your Master list you can think about creating your daily or weekly to-do-list now that you know your priorities. Be realistic about what you will be able to achieve.

Lastly, think about how you might celebrate achieving your goal(s), or getting a difficult task off your to-do list? We don't need to wait for the whole list to be complete before we celebrate - let's celebrate as we go!

I hope this has been interesting for you, and perhaps given you some food for thought.